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BLOOM: (As before) Rarely smoke, dear. Cigar now
and then. Childish device. (Lewdly) The mouth can be
better engaged than with a cylinder of rank weed.
ZOE: Go on. Make a stump speech out of it.
BLOOM: (In workman’s corduroy overalls, black gansy with
red floating tie and apache cap) Mankind is incorrigible. Sir
Walter Ralegh brought from the new world that potato
and that weed, the one a killer of pestilence by absorption,
the other a poisoner of the ear, eye, heart, memory, will
understanding, all. That is to say he brought the poison a
hundred years before another person whose name I forget
brought the food. Suicide. Lies. All our habits. Why, look
at our public life!
(Midnight chimes from distant steeples.)
THE CHIMES: Turn again, Leopold! Lord mayor of
Dublin!
BLOOM: (In alderman’s gown and chain) Electors of
Arran Quay, Inns Quay, Rotunda, Mountjoy and North
Dock, better run a tramline, I say, from the cattlemarket
to the river. That’s the music of the future. That’s my
programme.
Cui bono? But our bucaneering
Vanderdeckens in their phantom ship of finance ...
AN ELECTOR: Three times three for our future chief
magistrate!
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(The aurora borealis of the torchlight procession leaps.)
THE TORCHBEARERS: Hooray!
(Several wellknown burgesses, city magnates and freemen of
the city shake hands with Bloom and congratulate him. Timothy
Harrington, late thrice Lord Mayor of Dublin, imposing in
mayoral scarlet, gold chain and white silk tie, confers with
councillor Lorcan Sherlock, locum tenens. They nod vigorously in
agreement.)
LATE LORD MAYOR HARRINGTON: (In scarlet
robe with mace, gold mayoral chain and large white silk scarf)
That alderman sir Leo Bloom’s speech be printed at the
expense of the ratepayers. That the house in which he was
born be ornamented with a commemorative tablet and
that the thoroughfare hitherto known as Cow Parlour off
Cork street be henceforth designated Boulevard Bloom.
COUNCILLOR LORCAN SHERLOCK: Carried
unanimously.
BLOOM: (Impassionedly) These flying Dutchmen or
lying Dutchmen as they recline in their upholstered poop,
casting dice, what reck they? Machines is their cry, their
chimera, their panacea. Laboursaving apparatuses,
supplanters, bugbears, manufactured monsters for mutual
murder, hideous hobgoblins produced by a horde of
capitalistic lusts upon our prostituted labour. The poor
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man starves while they are grassing their royal mountain
stags or shooting peasants and phartridges in their purblind
pomp of pelf and power. But their reign is rover for rever
and ever and ev ...
(Prolonged applause. Venetian masts, maypoles and festal
arches spring up. A streamer bearing the legends Cead Mile
Failte and Mah Ttob Melek Israel Spans the street. All the
windows are thronged with sightseers, chiefly ladies. Along the
route the regiments of the royal Dublin Fusiliers, the King’s own
Scottish Borderers, the Cameron Highlanders and the Welsh
Fusiliers standing to attention, keep back the crowd. Boys from
High school are perched on the lampposts, telegraph poles,
windowsills, cornices, gutters, chimneypots, railings, rainspouts,
whistling and cheering the pillar of the cloud appears. A fife and
drum band is heard in the distance playing the Kol Nidre. The
beaters approach with imperial eagles hoisted, trailing banners and
waving oriental palms. The chryselephantine papal standard rises
high, surrounded by pennons of the civic flag. The van of the
procession appears headed by John Howard Parnell, city marshal,
in a chessboard tabard, the Athlone Poursuivant and Ulster King
of Arms. They are followed by the Right Honourable Joseph
Hutchinson, lord mayor of Dublin, his lordship the lord mayor of
Cork, their worships the mayors of Limerick, Galway, Sligo and
Waterford, twentyeight Irish representative peers, sirdars, grandees
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and maharajahs bearing the cloth of estate, the Dublin
Metropolitan Fire Brigade, the chapter of the saints of finance in
their plutocratic order of precedence, the bishop of Down and
Connor, His Eminence Michael cardinal Logue, archbishop of
Armagh, primate of all Ireland, His Grace, the most reverend Dr
William Alexander, archbishop of Armagh, primate of all
Ireland, the chief rabbi, the presbyterian moderator, the heads of
the baptist, anabaptist, methodist and Moravian chapels and the
honorary secretary of the society of friends. After them march the
guilds and trades and trainbands with flying colours: coopers, bird
fanciers, millwrights, newspaper canvassers, law scriveners,
masseurs, vintners, trussmakers, chimneysweeps, lard refiners,
tabinet and poplin weavers, farriers, Italian warehousemen, church
decorators, bootjack manufacturers, undertakers, silk mercers,
lapidaries, salesmasters, corkcutters, assessors of fire losses, dyers
and cleaners, export bottlers, fellmongers, ticketwriters, heraldic
seal engravers, horse repository hands, bullion brokers, cricket and
archery outfitters, riddlemakers, egg and potato factors, hosiers and
glovers, plumbing contractors. After them march gentlemen of the
bedchamber, Black Rod, Deputy Garter, Gold Stick, the master
of horse, the lord great chamberlain, the earl marshal, the high
constable carrying the sword of state, saint Stephen’s iron crown,
the chalice and bible. Four buglers on foot blow a sennet.
Beefeaters reply, winding clarions of welcome. Under an arch of
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