Microsoft Word Elisabeth Kubler-Ross On Death And Dying doc

you do if this were told to you, that you had four to fourteen months to live?" I'd just put it all in 
God's hands and trust in him. Of course, in the medical field I wanted everything possible that 
could be done for him. And our doctors told us there wasn't anything else and I even suggested 
cobalt, or even some type of X-ray or radiation, you know. They didn't suggest it, they said it was a 
fatal case. And my husband just isn't the type to give up either. So then when I talked it over with 
him, and I said, you know God, the only way God can work is through man and he inspires doctors. 
And, I said, we saw this little article, a neighbor brought over a magazine and we read it. I didn't 
even consult my husband. I just contacted the doctor here at the hospital `:Q 
 
DOCTOR: There was an article? 
 
AIRS, G: Yes, in a magazine. I thought, well now, they are having so much success. I know there 
isn't a cure, but they are having success. I'll just contact him. I wrote a letter and sent it special 
delivery and he received it at his desk on Saturday morning. His secretary wasn't in so he called me. 
He said, "I was very interested in your letter, it was very explanatory but I need a micropsic report. 
You could get it from your z doctor and send it just like you did my letter. You mailed it yesterday 
and I got it this morning." So that's what I did. I sent it. He called and he said, "Just as soon as I get 
a bed, they are remodelling this section, I'll call you." He says now, "I can't make you too many 
promises, but I certainly don't believe in this fatalistic approach." So, that really sounded wonderful 
to me. There was something else that we could do rather than just sit and wait like our doctors had 
told us. 
 
Then it seemed like everything went so fast. We came by ambulance. And I might say that the night 
they examined him, they couldn't give us very much hope. We were almost tempted to turn around 
and go home. And again I prayed about this. I left the hospital that night to go and stay with 
relatives. I didn't know what I would find the next morning. They left it so we could think about it, 
whether to go on with this treatment. Again I went and prayed about it and just said we'll try 
everything possible. I thought this is my husband's decision, not mine. That morning when I came 
in to the hospital, he had already made up his mind, "I'm going ahead with it." They said he would 
lose forty to sixty pounds and he had already lost so much through both surgeries. I really didn't 
know what to do. I just wasn't too surprised because I felt this was the way it would be going. And 
then, after they started the treatment, he was very, very ill. But like I said, they didn't make us any 
promises so we just had this one ray of hope that the treatment would possibly help to decrease the 
tumor and that the bowel would open up. We had a partial bowel obstruction and this was a chance. 
All the way through I had my moments of discouragement, but I would talk to different patients, 
here in the hospital, that had been very ill people. And I think, well, here I am encouraging them 
and look how black things look on our side a lot of times. But, I just kept staying right in there. I 
still have that approach. I know that research is going on in this field and I know that again the 
Scripture says that nothing is impossible with God. 
 
DOCTOR: Though you accept the fate, you also have some hope that something might still happen. 
 
MRS. c: That's right. 
 
DOCTOR: You also talk in terms of we, we had surgery, we decided to go ahead. It's really like 
you and he are really in tune to do things together. 
 

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MRS. c: I really think if it isn't meant for him to get well, if this is his time, I believe it's in God's 
will. 
 
(P118) 
 
DOCTOR: How old is your husband? 
 
MRS. c: He was fifty the day we came in here. 
 
DOCTOR: The day he came to the hospital. 
 
CHAPLAIN: Would you say that this experience has brought your family closer together? 
 
MRS. c: Oh, my, it has brought us closer. If nothing else, it has been a dependency on God. We are 
pretty self-sufficient, we think, but in times like these you find that you are not very much. I have 
learned to depend and live one day at a time and quit planning. We have today but we may not have 
tomorrow. And I say if this is fatal for my husband, I feel like it must be in God's hands, and maybe 
through our experience maybe somebody can have an added hope or strength in God. 
 
CHAPLAIN: Have you had a good relationship with the staff? I know you have a pleasant 
relationship with other patients because we've talked together in trying to bring some help to 
relatives of other patients. I sat there and listened to some of this. I was reminded of what you said 
a while ago. You found yourself talking to other people with optimism. What's it been like here for 
someone from out of town? What kind of support have you received from staff? What does a 
family member experience at this point in terms of someone as close to death as your husband? 
 
MRS. C: Well, since I am a nurse, I have talked with nurses quite a bit. I find there are some very 
devout Christian nurses who say that faith in God has a lot to do, that fighting, that not giving up 
has a lot to do with it. As a whole I think I have been able to talk with them. They have been so 
frank and so open, that's what I like about it. And I believe that members of the family are less in 
confusion if they're explained and told the facts even though hope is dim. I think people accept it. 
And I really think a lot of the hospital, I really think that they make a mighty fine team. 
 
CHAPLAIN: Would you say this was true not only for yourself but from what you have 
experienced with other families that have been here? 
 
MRS. c: Yes. 
 
CHAPLAIN: They want to know? 
 
MRS. c: Yes. So many families will say, oh, they are just wonderful here and if they don't know, 
nobody else does. That's the attitude I find, people just going out on the sun porches and talking 
with different visitors. They are saying this is a wonderful place. They are right on the ball. 
 
DOCTOR: Is there anything we-could improve? 
 

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