Microsoft Word Socialized Choices 31-12 pod docx

Socialized Choices - Labour Market Behaviour of Dutch Mothers  
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“Sometimes I think, ‘Go away all of you!’ I want to have space for myself. I 
start screaming at my children when they just ask an innocent question, then I 
feel guilty about it” (Medina).  
Yet, they would feel egoistic as well to take their children to day care more 
than three days per week. Most interviewed mothers within this group, as with the 
previous groups, wish to raise their children as much as possible by both parents 
themselves. They adapt – or try to at least – their working schedules as much as 
they can, in order to be able to collect their children from school. In other cases, 
they make use of a child-minder or, preferably, they ask their own parents to pick 
up their children from school.  
4. 
Full-time working mothers: Ambitious 
Narrative of choice 
As expected, mothers with full-time work have very strong narratives of choice 
towards work: “I come from the generation that you just do what you want “ 
(Ingrid). In particular, full-time working mothers seem clear in their choices and 
often deliberately do not choose part-time work. “I’m just not the type for part-
time work. I have not the discipline to say, ‘This is my limit, I do not work more’“ 
(Alisha). 
Generally these mothers didn’t even consider cutting back their work hours 
after their children were born. Some mothers believe it is impossible to perform 
their jobs in fewer hours, and they would have to choose a less interesting job if it 
was part-time. For example, a single mother, Michelle, describes that she needs 
the money, but she would also keep working if she didn’t need to. However, she 
would slow down her pace. That is to say, she would work the same number of 
hours, but differently.  
Sometimes, mothers work full-time because they want to be paid for the work 
they are doing, whereas other women might give up pay to be flexible in their 
work hours, but work an additional number of hours in their own time. Full-time 
working mothers want the salary they deserve. The narratives of full-time 
working mothers reveal a strong sense of self-agency.   
“And then I only wanted to live in Amsterdam. I first had to find a house and 
then a job, which was very difficult at that time […] I would never get stuck 
somewhere. I would never fall in despair and sit down: I hate it when people 
do that” (Michelle).  
And also Ilse, who went to Hong Kong, after she had already been to New 
York and Japan, to find a job there, which she achieved and she ended up staying 
there for five years. Later, when she reached the age of forty, she invited forty 
friends, and she put several points of discussion on the agenda about the 

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Chapter 3 - A qualitative typology of Dutch mothers’ employment narratives 
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combination of work and motherhood. She received so many positive reactions to 
her idea, that it was the beginning of her publishing her own magazine.  
Work attitude 
Remarkably, full-time working mothers recall that even though they are 
ambitious in their self-development, they have no wish to make a career or climb 
the social ladder. The mothers are ambitious and have careers, yet they claim not 
to be too preoccupied with their careers. Mothers rather underline the intrinsic 
values of work, and distance themselves from (petty) extrinsic values. 
“I am ambitious in terms of what I want to achieve, but not in terms of having 
a career that doesn’t interest me” (Lotte).  
Within this group, mothers also underline the importance of their economic 
independence. They describe how this value already existed before they entered 
the labour market.  
“I’ve always said as a young girl, that at the very least I want to earn my own 
money. It is one of the main reasons why I work” (Alisha).  
And for Annelies, it is horrific to think that because she has no income she 
couldn’t leave her partner if she wanted to.  Ambitious mothers cannot imagine 
being without work, and do not grasp what full-time mothers do all day. They 
consider it unwise and highlight the necessity of economic independence.  
“Then I think, ‘why did you study?’. I think there must be some payback, and 
that is what I miss a bit in the Netherlands” (Ebru). 
Generally, full-time working mothers have always worked many hours and 
enjoyed it. They do not mind that work takes up the majority of their time – it is 
taken-for-granted as part of the game if you want to be taken seriously by male 
colleagues and want to achieve something. Sometimes they would prefer more 
flexibility, and would like to work one day per week from home, if this is not yet 
possible.  
There are some exceptions of full-time working mothers who stepped out of 
the labour market for a (short) period. Some mothers who work in the public 
sector made use of the financially attractive availability of paid parental leave, 
when their children were younger. However, most of their experiences were 
negative. For example Ebru gave up her job overnight, because she was fed up 
with the “bullshit” at work. However, when she was at home she did not like it at 
all, “It is really no fun to be at home”, and she could only remember the good 
things about work. So she started working full-time again and her children went 
to professional day care five days a week, which is exceptional in the Netherlands 
and also demonstrates her strong sense of self-agency. Another example is Rosa, 
who had to stop working after her first pregnancy because of pelvic instability, 
yet she “missed the whole world”. 

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