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@thompson english IELTS Model Essays

Organising the Essay
This essay says:
Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?
In this type of essay it is best to discuss both pros and cons. This is because
the question suggests there are both. You still though have to say which
there are more of. 
In order to ensure your opinion reflects the structure of your essay, one
good way to organise it is with three body paragraphs. You then have two of
these focused on the side you support.
So for example, if you think there are more disadvantages of allowing
children to play on computers and tables, then you could organise your
essay as follows:
Opinion: Disadvantages outweigh the Advantages
Body 1: Advantage
Body 2: Disadvantage
Body 3: Disadvantage
Remember outweigh means more than (literally heavier than)! So in this
case, there are more disadvantages than advantages. 


Now take a look at the model answer:
Model Answer
More and more parents are allowing their children to play on
computers and tablets as they think that children should learn
technology skills.
Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?
These days it is common to observe children spending significant amounts
of time on electronic devices such as computers and tablets. In my opinion,
the drawbacks of allowing children to do this outweigh any advantages. 
The benefit of this development is that it will keep children occupied. There
is no doubt that raising children and taking care of them can be stressful at
times for parents so allowing them to play on a device means that the
parents can have a break and not have to continuously entertain them. This
could potentially mean improved family relationships.
However, there are several disadvantages. Firstly, children's free time can
be better utilised with other activities. Although they may learn some
technological skills, they mostly just play games, and in any case computer
skills are now taught in school. Of much more benefit is encouraging
children to spend their free time interacting with other children, playing
with normal toys, and playing other games outside, which will foster their
creative, cognitive, and social skills.
In addition to this there is growing evidence that it can also have negative
health impacts. Research reported in the media claims that it can possibly
damage the eyes of a child when looking at screens for long periods.
Studies also indicate children using these devices may have more difficulty
sleeping, something which is crucial for mental development.
In conclusion, the drawbacks of allowing children to use computers and
tablets outweigh the benefits. While it may give parents more time, it could
damage their mental and physical development.


(Words: 257)

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