This eBook is designed and published by Planet pdf. For more free

Ulysses 

851 

of

 1305 

BLOOM: My beloved subjects, a new era is about to 

dawn. I, Bloom, tell you verily it is even now at hand. 

Yea, on the word of a Bloom, ye shall ere long enter into 

the golden city which is to be, the new Bloomusalem in 

the Nova Hibernia of the future. 

(Thirtytwo workmen, wearing rosettes, from all the counties of 

Ireland, under the guidance of Derwan the builder, construct the 

new Bloomusalem. It is a colossal edifice with crystal roof, built in 

the shape of a huge pork kidney, containing forty thousand 

rooms. In the course of its extension several buildings and 

monuments are demolished. Government offices are temporarily 

transferred to railway sheds. Numerous houses are razed to the 

ground. The inhabitants are lodged in barrels and boxes, all 

marked in red with the letters: L. B. several paupers fill from a 

ladder. A part of the walls of Dublin, crowded with loyal 

sightseers, collapses.) 

THE SIGHTSEERS: (Dying) Morituri te salutant. (They 

die) 

(A man in a brown macintosh springs up through a trapdoor. 

He points an elongated finger at Bloom.) 

THE MAN IN THE MACINTOSH: Don’t you 

believe a word he says. That man is Leopold M’Intosh, the 

notorious fireraiser. His real name is Higgins. 

---

Ulysses 

852 

of

 1305 

BLOOM: Shoot him! Dog of a christian! So much for 

M’Intosh! 

(A cannonshot. The man in the macintosh disappears. Bloom 

with his sceptre strikes down poppies. The instantaneous deaths of 

many powerful enemies, graziers, members of parliament, 

members of standing committees, are reported. Bloom’s bodyguard 

distribute Maundy money, commemoration medals, loaves and 

fishes, temperance badges, expensive Henry Clay cigars, free 

cowbones for soup, rubber preservatives in sealed envelopes tied 

with gold thread, butter scotch, pineapple rock, billets doux in 

the form of cocked hats, readymade suits, porringers of toad in the 

hole, bottles of Jeyes’ Fluid, purchase stamps, 40 days’ 

indulgences, spurious coins, dairyfed pork sausages, theatre passes, 

season tickets available for all tramlines, coupons of the royal and 

privileged Hungarian lottery, penny dinner counters, cheap 

reprints of the World’s Twelve Worst Books: Froggy And Fritz 

(politic), Care of the Baby (infantilic), 50 Meals for 7/6 

(culinic), Was Jesus a Sun Myth? (historic), Expel that Pain 

(medic), Infant’s Compendium of the Universe (cosmic), Let’s 

All Chortle (hilaric), Canvasser’s Vade Mecum (journalic), 

Loveletters of Mother Assistant (erotic), Who’s Who in Space 

(astric), Songs that Reached Our Heart (melodic), Pennywise’s 

Way to Wealth (parsimonic). A general rush and scramble. 

Women press forward to touch the hem of Bloom’s robe. The 

---

Ulysses 

853 

of

 1305 

Lady Gwendolen Dubedat bursts through the throng, leaps on his 

horse and kisses him on both cheeks amid great acclamation. A 

magnesium flashlight photograph is taken. Babes and sucklings 

are held up.) 

THE WOMEN: Little father! Little father! 

THE BABES AND SUCKLINGS: 

Clap clap hands till Poldy comes home, 

Cakes in his pocket for Leo alone.  

(Bloom, bending down, pokes Baby Boardman gently in the 

stomach.) 

BABY BOARDMAN: (Hiccups, curdled milk flowing from 

his mouth) Hajajaja. 

BLOOM: (Shaking hands with a blind stripling) My more 

than Brother! (Placing his arms round the shoulders of an old 

couple) Dear old friends! (He plays pussy fourcorners with 

ragged boys and girls) Peep! Bopeep! (He wheels twins in a 

perambulator) Ticktacktwo wouldyousetashoe? (He performs 

juggler’s tricks, draws red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo and 

violet silk handkerchiefs from his mouth) Roygbiv. 32 feet per 

second.  (He consoles a widow) Absence makes the heart 

grow younger. (He dances the Highland fling with grotesque 

antics) Leg it, ye devils! (He kisses the bedsores of a palsied 

veteran) Honourable wounds! (He trips up a fit policeman) U. 

---

Ulysses 

854 

of

 1305 

p: up. U. p: up. (He whispers in the ear of a blushing waitress 

and laughs kindly) Ah, naughty, naughty! (He eats a raw 

turnip offered him by Maurice Butterly, farmer) Fine! Splendid! 

(He refuses to accept three shillings offered him by Joseph Hynes, 

journalist) My dear fellow, not at all! (He gives his coat to a 

beggar) Please accept. (He takes part in a stomach race with 

elderly male and female cripples) Come on, boys! Wriggle it, 

girls! 

THE CITIZEN: (Choked with emotion, brushes aside a 

tear in his emerald muffler) May the good God bless him! 

(The rams’ horns sound for silence. The standard of Zion is 

hoisted.) 

BLOOM:  (Uncloaks impressively, revealing obesity, unrolls 

a paper and reads solemnly) Aleph Beth Ghimel Daleth 

Hagadah Tephilim Kosher Yom Kippur Hanukah 

Roschaschana Beni Brith Bar Mitzvah Mazzoth 

Askenazim Meshuggah Talith. 

(An official translation is read by Jimmy Henry, assistant 

town clerk.) 

JIMMY HENRY: The Court of Conscience is now 

open. His Most Catholic Majesty will now administer 

open air justice. Free medical and legal advice, solution of 

doubles and other problems. All cordially invited. Given at 

---