3. Give Quietly or Anonymously
Once you have learned to give of yourself, then
the next step is to learn to
give when you cannot receive anything in return. It’s almost always easier to
give when you receive recognition for it than it is when no one is likely to know
about it. The people who give in order to receive a lot of fanfare, however, have
already received any reward they will get.
There are spiritual, mental, and
emotional benefits that come only to those who give anonymously. If you’ve
never done it before, try it.
4. Invest in People Intentionally
The highest level of unselfish thinking comes when you give of yourself to
another person for that person’s personal development or well-being. If you’re
married
or a parent, you know this from personal experience. What does your
spouse value most highly: money in the bank or your time freely given? What
would small children really rather have from you:
a toy or your undivided
attention? The people who love you would rather have you than what you can
give them.
If you want to become the kind of person who invests in people, then consider
others and their journey so that you can collaborate with them. Each relationship
is like a partnership created for mutual benefit. As you go into any relationship,
think about how you can invest in the other person so that it becomes a win-win
situation. Here is how relationships most often play out:
I win, you lose—I win only once.
You win, I lose—You win only once.
We both win—We win many times.
We both lose—Good-bye, partnership!
The best relationships are win-win. Why don’t
more people go into
relationships with that attitude? I’ll tell you why: most people want to make sure
that they win first. Unselfish thinkers, on the other hand, go into a relationship
and make sure that the other person wins first. And that makes all the difference.
