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@thompson english IELTS Model Essays

Child Obesity Essay
This causes and effects model essay is about obesity in children.
You specifically have to talk about the causes (reasons) of the increase in
overweight children, and explain the effects (results) of this.
Here is the question:
The percentage of overweight children in western society has
increased by almost 20% in the last ten years.
Discuss the causes and effects of this disturbing trend.
This particular essay is organized as follows:
Body 1: Causes
Body 2: Effects
Of course it is also possible to have a 3 body paragraph essay. For example:
Body 1: Causes
Body 2: Causes
Body 3: Effects
Or:
Body 1: Causes
Body 2: Effects
Body 3: Effects
However, remember not to write too little on one part.
For example, if you wrote one very short paragraph about 'causes' with little
support and most of your essay on 'effects', you may then be seen to have not
fully answered both parts of the question.


Another possible way of organizing it is to put each cause and its effect
within a separate paragraph:
Body 1: Cause 1 - Effect
Body 2: Cause 2 - Effect
If you do this though, each particular cause must relate to that specific
effect. 
Model Answer
The percentage of overweight children in western society has increased by
almost 20% in the last ten years.
Discuss the causes and effects of this disturbing trend.
Over the last ten years, western societies have seen close to a 20% rise in the
number of children who are overweight. This essay will discuss some


reasons why this has occurred and examine the consequences of this
worrying trend.
The main cause of this problem is poor diet. Over the last decade there has
been a prolific increase in the number of fast food restaurants. For example,
on nearly every high street there is a MacDonald’s, Kentucky Fried Chicken
and Pizza Hut. The food in these places has been proven to be very
unhealthy, and much of the advertising is targeted at children, thus ensuring
that they constitute the bulk of the customers of these establishments.
However, it is not only due to eating out, but also the type of diet many
children have at home. A lot of food consumed is processed food, especially
with regards to ready-made meals which are a quick and easy option for
parents who are working hard. 
The effects of this have been and will continue to be very serious. Firstly,
there has been a large increase in health related diseases amongst children,
especially diabetes. This debilitating illness means a child has to be injected
with insulin for the rest of their life. Not only this, very overweight children
often experience bullying from other children, which may affect their mental
health. The negative stigma of being overweight may also affect self-esteem.
To sum up, it is evident that there are several causes of obesity amongst
children, and a variety of negative effects. Society must ensure steps are
taken to prevent this problem from deteriorating further. 
(275 words)



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