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23. I text message my friends and parents more than I call them by phone.

YES

24. I watch more movies via the Internet or Netflix than in a movie theater.

F

YES

25. I make an effort to buy organic produce each week.

YES

26. I have more than 50 Web sites bookmarked on my computer.

F

YES

27. I have more than 250 friends on Facebook.

YES

28. I purchase plastic water bottles rather than use a stainless steel bottle.

F

YES

29. I have more than 25 apps on my iPhone/Android.

YES

30. I watch at least one YouTube or Socialcam video per day.

F

YES

31. The majority of my purchases are via credit card or debit card, not cash.

YES

32. I post an update to Facebook at least once a day.

F

YES

33. I belong to more than one social networking Web site.

YES

34. I prefer to read books via a Kindle or an iPad than hard cover books.

F

YES

35. I post photos and various items on Pinterest and Instagram each week.

YES

NO

Results: The purpose of these questions is to increase your awareness of the influence the current culture has

on your behaviors. There is no definitive answer or “score” regarding the impact of cultural influences. We

participate in cultural practices primarily as a means of being accepted. Most people are completely unaware

of the influence that society has on them, unless they purposely act differently than cultural norms suggest.

© Paramount Wellness Institute. Reprinted with permission. All rights reserved.

EXERCISE 1.6: Are You a Product of Your Culture? cont....

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Experts have noticed a dramatic decline in civility, which closely parallels the rise in the use of technology. While

it is easy to observe rude and uncivil behavior in other, it’s not so easy to see it in ourselves (the ego’s ability

to rationalize one’s behavior is quite powerful). This exercise invites you to take an honest look at your civil

behaviors and determine how you stack up with what is culturally expected as good manners in a civil society.

Write the number that corresponds with the frequency of each behavior in the frequency column.

5 5 Always 4 = Often 3 5 Sometimes 2 5 Seldom 1 5 Rarely 0 5 Never

Behavior

Frequency

1. I hold the door open for people when walking into or out of a store or building.

2. If I use my smartphone in public, I find a quiet place to talk away from people.

3. I make a habit of smiling at others including store clerks, postal workers, and

restaurant servers.

4. I only use the express checkout lane in the grocery store when I have the limited number of

suggested items, even when in a hurry.

5. When driving, I allow other drivers to cut in front of me.

6. If I am at the movies with a friend, I will suspend all conversations during the film.

7. While on the phone, I give my full attention and don’t multitask with checking

emails, etc.

8. I let people finish speaking before I say something or comment.

9. I say the words please and thank you when requesting something.

10. I don’t use my smartphone while driving.

11. I will pull a dollar out of my wallet or purse for a homeless person.

12. If I receive a second call while talking, I will ignore the incoming call.

13. When listening to my iPod while walking, jogging, snowboarding, or downhill skiing,

I acknowledge others’ presence with a smile, nod, or comment.

14. When others express political or religious beliefs that are different than mine, I shift

the conversation to a different topic.

15. I tend to censor the use of swear words in public.

TOTAL SCORE

Key: There is no set standard for degrees of civility. Either you are or you are not! This survey is an awareness

tool to help you examine your own behavior. If you score less than 30 points, you might consider changing

because most likely people see you as lacking in civility.

EXERCISE 1.7: Living in the Age of Civility

Chapter 1

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Consider these facts: Today anyone can publish their own book, record their own song, enter a photo con-

test, post their own blog, make their own movie, and gain worldwide attention if not millions of fans via

YouTube. Reality shows are the rage on TV, from Jersey Shore to home improvement shows. Anyone can

become a celebrity, specifically a “laptop celebrity.” Experts who keep their finger on the pulse of humanity

grow increasingly concerned. The “me” generation has now expanded over several decades to include several

generations. The self-absorbed, all-about-me, narcissistic, 15-minutes-of-fame culture is nothing more than

the ego run amuck. The problems with unbridled egos (multiplied by 7 billion people) cannot be understated!

If everyone is only looking out for themselves, many people, perhaps cultures, if not the world, will suffer.

Recently the American Psychiatric Association decided to delete the Narcissism Disorder from the Diagnostic

and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, fifth edition, in 2013, suggesting that this behavior is too common

now to be recognized as a disorder. Granted, you have to have some interest in yourself. After all, that’s what

self-esteem is all about. Balance is the key. At what point is the line crossed? That is the million-dollar ques-

tion. The opposite of narcissism is altruism—doing something for others without any expectation of recipro-

cation; in essence, random acts of kindness.

1. Have you noticed that, in general, people are self-absorbed, perhaps even clueless about others eclipsed by

their own stature and in denial about their inflated egos?

2. Have you been accused of being narcissistic, or simply full of yourself? Please explain.

3. How would you best describe your “presence” in the world? Do you have a Web site? A blog? Mul-

tiple YouTube video postings? Tweets on a Twitter account? Books on Amazon? How many Facebook

updates do you post per day? How many minutes have you used up on your 15 minutes of fame allotment

(or have you gone over this limit)?

4. Why do you suppose people are over the top with being self-righteous or simply fascinated with them-

selves? Is it a need for approval? Is it a need for acceptance? Is it a question of insecurity? What is your

take on this new normal of the “me” generation?

5. If indeed altruism is the polar opposite of narcissism, what actions do you take on a regular basis to seek

balance? What do you do to domesticate your ego?

EXERCISE 1.8: It’s All About Me: The Age of Narcissism

“Enough about me. What do you think about me?” — Bette Midler

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Technology is great and can make so many aspects of life convenient. Conversely, we can spend untold

amounts of time online with some unhealthy consequences. Sociologists have noted that three specific behav-

iors are common with people who spend gobs of time online. They report being constantly tired, always busy,

and, perhaps most surprising, lonely. It’s time to do an inventory on how you feel with regard to these specific

aspects of your life.

1. Tiredness: Generally speaking, how would you rate your overall energy levels? Are you tired when you

wake up in the morning, or do you feel fully rested? Do you find yourself dragging through the course of

the day and cannot wait to get home to unwind? Do you have plenty of energy in the early evening, or do

you flop on the sofa and veg out till you fall asleep? Take a few moments to explain your levels of energy,

and if you do feel a sense of constant tiredness, describe it here.

________________________________________________________________________________

2. Busyness: Do you feel that you barely have time to catch your breath with countless responsibilities to

do each day? Do you feel like you are constantly running on a treadmill and there is no way to get off?

Do you find that you are always doing something related to your smartphone or tablet? Are you always

plugged in? Do you feel that your rate of busyness is proportional to what you actually get done, or do

you feel that you are always busy but don’t have much to show for it? Take a few moments to explain

your perspective on how you actually spend your personal energy and your level of productivity.

________________________________________________________________________________

3. Loneliness: Experts who observe people constantly using their smartphones and tablets have noticed that,

generally speaking, people spend a lot of time online because they fear being alone. Spending time posting

updates on social networking sites tends to make people feel like they belong, yet when questioned, these

same people often describe life off line as feeling alienated and detached. Loneliness isn’t the same thing

as being alone (there are many people who will tell you that they feel quite lonely with their spouse, their

roommate, and even their friends). Here are some questions to contemplate: (1) Do you stay online to feel

a sense of connection to people even if it’s a virtual rather than actual connection? (2) Do you feel awk-

ward or uncomfortable being alone for long periods of time? (3) Do you make it a point to never be alone?

(4) Do you constantly fill your social calendar to the brim every day? (5) Describe your typical day and

include purposeful alone time.

________________________________________________________________________________

EXERCISE 1.9: The Tired, Busy, Lonely Checklist

Chapter 1

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How tuned in to the environment are you? Let’s find out. Take this quick True/False quiz.

1. The majority of the ocean’s coral reefs are dying due to agricul-

tural runoff, poor fishing practices, and formaldehyde used to

capture tropical fish.

F

TRUE

FALSE

2. Over 60 percent of food in your local grocery store is genetically

modified.

F

TRUE

FALSE

3. About one half of the world’s population does not have drinkable

water in their house.

F

TRUE

FALSE

4. The acidity of the world’s oceans is increasing at an alarming rate.

TRUE

FALSE

5. Wild salmon has much less PCBs than that raised in fisheries.

F

TRUE

FALSE

6. Mercury found in coldwater fish comes from coal-burning plants

used to make electricity for everyday use.

F

TRUE

FALSE

7. Hormones and antibiotics dumped into toilets are not filtered

out in water treatment plants.

F

TRUE

FALSE

8. Experts predict that the ocean’s natural fisheries will collapse in

your lifetime.

F

TRUE

FALSE

9. It takes 2,500 gallons of water to produce one hamburger.

TRUE

FALSE

10. On average, there are over 16 million new cars on the road every

year.

F

F

TRUE

FALSE

11. Ethanol fuel still requires petrochemicals (oil) for fertilizers to

grow the corn.

TRUE

FALSE

12. Farm-raised salmon must take beta carotine pellets so its flesh is

pink/orange.

TRUE

FALSE

13. City light pollution is thought to be a contributing factor to the

increase in insomnia across the United States.

TRUE

FALSE

14. The majority of food in your local grocery story has been trans-

ported over 1,500 miles to rest on those store shelves before being

purchased.

F

TRUE

FALSE

15.

Droughts in the Amazon rainforest contribute to global

warming.

TRUE

FALSE

The answer for all of these questions is true. But don’t get too stressed out. Being aware of each problem is

half of the solution. Knowledge is power. Environmental disconnect is based largely on ignorance and apathy.

Although some people choose to stick their head in the sand, others are taking an active role towards living

a sustainable life by changing their behaviors to become in sync with the environment. One person’s life may

seem insignificant to the big picture, but nothing could be further from the truth. What can you do? Plenty!

EXERCISE 1.10: The Environmental Disconnect

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EXERCISE 1.10: The Environmental Disconnect cont....

List ten things that you do (or can start doing) to live a more sustainable lifestyle and reconnect with the

biosphere we live on called planet Earth.

1. _________________________________________________________________________________

2. _________________________________________________________________________________

3. _________________________________________________________________________________

4. _________________________________________________________________________________

5. _________________________________________________________________________________

6. _________________________________________________________________________________

7. _________________________________________________________________________________

8. _________________________________________________________________________________

9. _________________________________________________________________________________

10. _________________________________________________________________________________

Chapter 1

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The circle is a universal symbol of wholeness, as expressed in the American Indian medicine wheel, the

Tibetan mandala, and many other symbols recognized worldwide. Typically these symbols depict four aspects

such as spring, summer, winter, and fall; mind, body, spirit, and emotions; or north, south, east, and west.

This exercise invites you to increase your awareness of the power of this symbol.

1. List ten objects, found in nature, that symbolize wholeness (e.g., full moon, sun, etc.).

2. List ten objects or designs that are used in American culture (or world culture) to convey a sense of

wholeness to the unconscious mind (e.g., Starbucks logo, dinner plates, Christmas wreaths, the peace

symbol, etc.).

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