THE REALITY OF THE UNSEEN
59
what should I do? ‘Love me,’ answered my God. ‘I do, I do,’ I cried
passionately. ‘Come unto me,’ called my Father. ‘I will,’ my heart panted.
Did I stop to ask a single question? Not one. It never occurred to me to
ask whether I was good enough, or to hesitate over my unfitness, or to find
out what I thought of his church, or . . . to wait until I should be satisfied.
Satisfied! I was satisfied. Had I not found my God and my Father? Did he
not love me? Had he not called me? Was there not a Church into which
I might enter? . . . Since then I have had direct answers to prayer — so
significant as to be almost like talking with God and hearing his answer.
The idea of God’s reality has never left me for one moment.”
Here is still another case, the writer being a man aged twenty-
seven, in which the experience, probably almost as characteristic,
is less vividly described: —
“I have on a number of occasions felt that I had enjoyed a period of
intimate communion with the divine. These meetings came unasked and
unexpected, and seemed to consist merely in the temporary obliteration of
the conventionalities which usually surround and cover my life. . . . Once
it was when from the summit of a high mountain I looked over a gashed and
corrugated landscape extending to a long convex of ocean that ascended
to the horizon, and again from the same point when I could see nothing
beneath me but a boundless expanse of white cloud, on the blown surface
of which a few high peaks, including the one I was on, seemed plunging
about as if they were dragging their anchors. What I felt on these occasions
was a temporary loss of my own identity, accompanied by an illumination
which revealed to me a deeper significance than I had been wont to
attach to life. It is in this that I find my justification for saying that I have
enjoyed communication with God. Of course the absence of such a being
as this would be chaos. I cannot conceive of life without its presence.”
Of the more habitual and so to speak chronic sense of God’s
presence the following sample from Professor Starbuck’s manuscript
collection may serve to give an idea. It is from a man aged forty-
nine, — probably thousands of unpretending Christians would write
an almost identical account.
“God is more real to me than any thought or thing or person. I feel his
presence positively, and the more as I live in closer harmony with his laws
as written in my body and mind. I feel him in the sunshine or rain; and
awe mingled with a delicious restfulness most nearly describes my feelings.
I talk to him as to a companion in prayer and praise, and our communion
is delightful. He answers me again and again, often in words so clearly
60THE VARIETIES OF RELIGIOUS EXPERIENCE
spoken that it seems my outer ear must have carried the tone, but gener-
ally in strong mental impressions. Usually a text of Scripture, unfolding
some new view of him and his love for me, and care for my safety. I could
give hundreds of instances, in school matters, social problems, financial
difficulties, etc. That he is mine and I am his never leaves me, it is an
abiding joy. Without it life would be a blank, a desert, a shoreless, trackless
waste.”
I subjoin some more examples from writers of different ages and
sexes. They are also from Professor Starbuck’s collection, and their
number might be greatly multiplied. The first is from a man twenty-
seven years old: —
“God is quite real to me. I talk to him and often get answers. Thoughts
sudden and distinct from any I have been entertaining come to my mind
after asking God for his direction. Something over a year ago I was
for some weeks in the direst perplexity. When the trouble first appeared
before me I was dazed, but before long (two or three hours) I could hear
distinctly a passage of Scripture: ‘My grace is sufficient for thee.’ Every
time my thoughts turned to the trouble I could hear this quotation.
I don’t think I ever doubted the existence of God, or had him drop out of
my consciousness. God has frequently stepped into my affairs very per-
ceptibly, and I feel that he directs many little details all the time. But on
two or three occasions he has ordered ways for me very contrary to my
ambitions and plans.”
Another statement (none the less valuable psychologically for
being so decidedly childish) is that of a boy of seventeen: —
“Sometimes as I go to church, I sit down, join in the service, and before
I go out I feel as if God was with me, right side of me, singing and read-
ing the Psalms with me. . . . And then again I feel as if I could sit beside
him, and put my arms around him, kiss him, etc. When I am taking Holy
Communion at the altar, I try to get with him and generally feel his
presence.”
I let a few other cases follow at random: —
“God surrounds me like the physical atmosphere. He is closer to me than
my own breath. In him literally I live and move and have my being.” —
“There are times when I seem to stand in his very presence, to talk with
him. Answers to prayer have come, sometimes direct and overwhelming
in their revelation of his presence and powers. There are times when God
seems far off, but this is always my own fault.” —