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Učini nas dostojnim
Da možemo ponuditi Tebi
Vodu,
Krv i Suze
za oprost grijeha.
Oglasi nam se, Molimo Te."
"O Bože Svega", nastavih ja, "Ne dozvoli da ova silina vodenog Elementa ispere iz njih ovu blaženu
začaranost. Pomozi im, o Bože, da saberu, sačuvaju i pospreme u džepove sjećanja ovu noć. Možda
jednoga dana, kada budu unucima pričali priče, izdvoje ovu epizodicu, kao nešto najljepše što im se
dogodilo.
Blagi osmijeh, što će se u tom trenutku pojaviti na njihovim licima, bit će dostojna naknada za sumor
svakodnevice.
Amen, Amen i Amen !!!"
Žamor. Iznenađena, shvatim da je autobus prepun. Prepun žena. Kada se budu vraćale s posla, ruke će
im otežati od vrećica s hranom. Njihovi muževi doći će kući automobilima.
Smjenjuju se mirisi znoja, jutarnje rakijice i ustajalog češnjaka. Napokon, evo i mog odredišta.
Pogledamo se s razumijevanjem, vozač i ja.
Ponovo sam na kiši.
Rani autobus;
Gledaju put nigdje
pospana lica.
THE EARLY BUS
From the moment the clock starts to ring, every second is programmed. If I make even one unex-
pected move, I am late for the bus. In semi-darkness (I do not want to wake up the others) I try to find
the keys in my purse, thinking at the same time that it urgently need a good sorting out.
Outside, there is a strong southerly wind and rain. My umbrella has instantly become a sail, and soon
after a useless rag on a stick. Now I am wet, but completely awake. Pure initiation.
The rain with the wind.
overturned
umbrella
becomes sail
There is nobody at the bus stop, nor in the street. Window shutters are banging, a trash bin is rolling,
and a small stream, just arisen, is turning and twisting and cleaning the street. A muffled rumble and
the bus appears from round the corner. "The sun warmed me up when I saw you", I tried to joke with
the driver. "In weather like this" faking astonishment, smiling at his remark. "Just because of that", I
reply taking the first empty seat. I hear the driver singing. It seems that my joke has altered his usual
train of thoughts for this time of day. It has taken him away from his daily monotony.
I wipe the steamy window and watch the street.
Spreading,
on a foggy window
someone’s name.
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Cars are rushing through black puddles gleaming with split oil. Resigned passers-by are not even try-
ing to move away. They are wet anyway. With their serious faces, they carry on with their indoor dia-
logues, unconscious of them selves or the world.
Old lady’s head
covered with plastic bag.
Feet in a paddle.
On a big billboard, there are two posters. Each of them show a beauty with naked breasts. One of
them is proudly showing her pithiness like Lillith with
expression of Eve on her face, while the other,
with a baby on her breasts, is supposed to represent Eve, but watching her you can recognise Lillith.
It seems that everyone wants to be someone else or something else.
Lillith is the irresistible
donna fatale. Existence is a pure joy for her and the world toy, meanwhile,
Eve is balancing between imposed roles: wife, mother, housewife and working woman. She doesn't
even notice that days are slipping
away under her feet, leaving her empty, washed out, unfulfilled.
But whatever a woman chooses, to be either Eve or Lillith, she'll make the same mistake, she won't
make the same mistake. The result is the same.
Suddenly I'm brought back by the screeching of brakes. A young couple is getting on the bus.
Judging
by their clothes, I guess they are coming from their graduation party. He is tall, thin, wearing a suit
and tie. She is wearing a dress in muran-glass colour, it is transparent. Long, wet hair corers her
cheeks.
Spring rain;
Girl's cheeks
Soaked by her hear.
I'm watching her and I can't make up my mind where I would put her.
Is she a real living girl, Ondina
queen of Water, or maybe the Princess of Cups who has just slipped off a Tarot card.
They don't talk, but their bodies do.
On his face alternate expressions of ecstasy, confusion, and pride. Tonight he did so many things for
the first time. He wore a suit
and tie for the first time, he danced according to well known rules for the
first time, and judging from his protecting look towards her, it seems that tonight he took one step be-
yond a stolen kiss.
She, my Ondina, safe in his arms, with a mysteriously and slightly mocking smile says: "Well, now I
have just opened the secret door of to hood."
There they are, with their thoughts about each other, dazed, carried away.
The
bus has stopped, I could hear the noise made by brakes, and the young couple get off, going out
into the rain tin each other's arms. They are walking slowly; it seems that they are afraid to walk faster
in case it destroys their magic. My look follows them to the rain curtain where they disappear.
Suddenly I remembered a prayer from Grimoire (an old magic script) I read a long time ago:
"Oh,
You mighty King of the sea
King of the Great Flood and Spring rains